Friday, March 20, 2015

The Relationship Vacation

No man needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one.
Elbert Hubbard

When Brandon and I were on our honeymoon, we quickly realized that we like to vacation a little differently. He is a "doer" and I am a "sitter." We've recently concluded that these tendencies are part nature, and part nurture. 

By water = happy Julianne

Brandon is a natural doer. His idea of a relaxing Saturday is accomplishing as many things as humanly possible. In a vacation setting, this equates to a love for being on the move - what can he see, what can he experience, what new foods can he try? He likes to be on the go!

Brandon did some cooking with my uncle on this vacation. While I do most of the cooking at home, my uncle is an incredible chef and amazing teacher!

I have a more introverted personality. While I enjoy experiencing new things, I tend to like to move at a little slower pace, and like to spend more time in one place rather than always being on the go. When I was in late elementary school/middle school, my brothers started working and stopped coming on as many family vacations as they used to. Since it was typically just my parents and me, many vacations were spent with me sitting by a lake/ocean/park with 20-30+ (no joke) books. I loved this.

The boys are back! We were able to spend a couple of days with one of Brandon's best friends and his new wife.

As a couple, we are pretty good at balancing our differences. Brandon brings along some good music and sits in the shade so I can have some downtime, and I'll pack my tennis shoes and get a little more active.

Last week we headed to California to visit some family and friends. More than anything, we've begun to dub this our "social" vacation. It wasn't necessarily the most relaxing, but we had such an incredible time building relationships. We spent hours in deep conversation, enjoyed delicious food, and turned off the TV, our cell phones, and our computers.

We also spent an evening with my college roommate - who I haven't seen in almost 4 years!

Sweet baby Jackson

Although we arrived home physically exhausted and a little talked out (which is a pretty big feat for us!) we both deemed this a wonderful vacation. 

Dinner with a sweet friend (almost-cousin) and my little cousin. This family gives me so much hope for living away from my family and nieces/nephews. They are the family that we live the furthest away from, but are definitely closest to. I'm learning its all about the quality of the time spent together, not necessarily the quantity.


  1. Different vacation personalities are real! I am very much a doer--I feel like, over the years, Ange has become more of a 'doer'....possibly due to a slight amount of peer pressure...

  2. I am so with you. Give me lots of books and a place to sit and I am all about vacation!! Fortunately, Allen and I are in complete agreement on this. Allen does get a little jittery at first while he makes the withdraw from his crazy work schedule. But he gets it out of his system by running to the grocery store for half and half. When we travel and do a lot of sight seeing, or even places like Disney World, we don't call that vacation. Oh, it is fun, but it is not restful. Years ago we had made the observation about how people vacation differently. When Terry and Katrina vacation they always have a minute by minute itinerary for their entire trip. I would hate that. But they love it. Our kids definitely are in the same place as us. Now that we have developed so many relationships with the locals we always have a lot of activities and visiting at the beach. This does not suit the kids who say we need to find some other place to vacation where we don't know anyone. :0 It is good that you all have worked out compromises that suit everyone.

  3. My husband and I discovered the same thing on our honeymoon. Only I'm the doer and he is the sitter. It's funny all the things you learn so quickly in your marriage!